Thursday, October 14, 2021

Hail to the Chief

     I wandered into the gross room around 3:45 after I had checked the board for late frozens. Jessica and Savanna were the only ones left - they were hunched over a catalogue. Jessica said we just grossed in two large dead bowels and are taking a break. Looking for stuff to buy. This catalogue is amazing! Tell me about it, I said. It's called Uline if I recall? Endless office supplies. Oh look! We need this. They were swooning. Zip ties!

    Jessica told me there was a woman that tried to sell them a 10,000 dollar piece of equipment a couple of weeks ago. It fit under the cassette labeler, and spit out something that attached a zip tie to all the cassettes to keep them in order while they were waiting in the queue and to keep them organized when they spit out cassettes for the PA's. She was like hell! Great idea. But I can get zip ties for 2 bucks at Home Depot and do that myself. We all laughed and I congratulated them on their ingenuity. They were also looking at cookie sheets. Something to use at the grossing station to gross on that will catch the blood and contain it and keep it from making such a mess. Genius, I told them. Go for it.

    Lindsey walked in from NLR - she is on call with me. I told her it looked like we were clear for late frozens and bonus! We are limping toward the weekend finally. Limping is about right, she said. She was looking at the schedule for tomorrow and exclaimed hell yes! Hagans and Fant are both off tomorrow. I didn't know about Hagans but Fant called me earlier in the day to fix a typo on a case and told me she was on her way out of town for a long weekend. We scored, I told Lindsey. Knock on wood for a good call weekend. Jessica said she cannot remember when both of the breast surgeons were off at the same time.

    Poor me, said Savanna, I am on call next week. You will be drowning in boobs, I told her, and Jessica guffawed. Savanna deadpanned, yes but not the good ones. LOLOL. They told me that once, about ten years ago, some visiting student walked into the lab when they were grossing in a dead bowel and said Wow! It smells like moist cherries in here. That is their running joke for dead bowel. What the heck is a moist cherry, I asked. Reminds me of the restaurant Juicy Seafood. S and I ate there once years ago and it was decent but we haven't returned. The name is off putting. They were looking for potent air fresheners for dead bowel. I told them the plants they have are supposed to help - they have three NASA air clearing plants - Jess is a green thumb she inspires me. Jess said we would need at least one for every grossing station. Savanna said no, we'd need a forest to combat that smell. 

    Another busy day but I joked to the girls that 130 blocks used to be a crazy hell day but now I'm like yay! Only 130! At least it's not 170 or 200, which is becoming a new norm. Savanna marveled when I told her we used to have 70 block days once a week, twice if we were lucky. No more. It's a grind. In other small news, I will be the next chief. I'm kind of secretly beating my chest and getting drunk on the possibility of power. I'll be the first female chief in PLA history. The staff doesn't even know it yet.

    To be fair, I'm kind of chief by default. Shaver has been doing it for years - he's going through a divorce, poor guy, and we commiserate about that. He's done. Hal, who is vice, doesn't want it. All the other guys who have been working ten years or more than me aren't interested. Melody, as head of clin lab in LR, is too busy for the extra meetings. There has been no fanfare. When I got elected chief resident many years ago it was much more of a big deal. Then they tried to take it away from me, because I was going to be gone on maternity leave for the first month. Such a toxic, misogynist environ. I pleaded my case (I got the most votes!) and suggested that the runner up co-chief with me to make it more palatable to them. They reluctantly agreed. 

    So I get to be in the room where it happens. A room, Shaver assured me, would become quite boring and too much. But I'm excited to be with all the other chiefs and the admins. Change might not happen with me, but I've got opportunity. My grandpa Jack on my mom's side, he was in the Navy, was nicknamed Chief. My brother Matt carries that nickname too. Move over, make some room, there is a new Chief in town. Happy Friday Eve, much love, Elizabeth


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