Friday, February 10, 2017

Gross Room

Me: So what's up with this new hat everyone in the OR is wearing? It's so crazy. Tall skinny floral chef hat. Combined with the scrubs and the clogs, it's not good.

Female PA: I think they put their hair under it.

Me: They would need a helluva lot of hair to fill that hat. Who do they think they are? British soldiers gone Mad Hatter? What happened to the chill square version of the do-rag?

Female PA: And they are all so skinny, those nurse anesthetists. Don't they get cold back there in the OR?

Me: Yes. I was walking behind one, on my way here, and I was trying to find the contours of her butt through her skinny scrubs while she was walking. A personal challenge. No dice.

Female PA: We need to help them. Sweaters and cheeseburgers!!

Me: LOL! I agree. And a freaking stylist. So what are we doing?

Female PA: Ovarian cancer. Pretty obvious. I'm cutting now, will have it ready in a minute or so.

Male PA, working at another grossing station: Who would name their daughter Nympha?

Me: Really? That's her name?

Male PA: Well, it's spelled different, but still.

Me: How old is she?

Male PA: 40 ish.

Me: Well at least she made it that far.

Male PA #2: I'll bet she was invited to all the dances.

Me: I'm guessing she wasn't the wallflower.

Female PA: Frozen is ready.

Me: You were right. Ugly. I called, gyn/onc is sending the other ovary, he says it's the same but he's cool with no frozen. Thanks a bunch.

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