But something else weird is happening. I'm starting to notice that guys look at me. Did this happen before, and I wasn't aware?
Here are some examples:
Doctor's lounge a couple of weeks ago - a surgeon tells me, while I am cranking out coffee from the oil machine, that I look like a teenager. Normally, this would make me blush, but I smiled and engaged him in small talk.
Doctor's lounge a month ago - a specialty surgeon engages me in small talk and gives me way TMI about his history, family life, and divorce. I listen and assure him that I will send any cute single ladies I know his way (although he has already given off enough strange signals that I wonder if this is a good idea, for anyone I know).
My decorator has been helping me organize and get the house ready for market all week. He's playing matchmaker - sending guys 12 years my junior my way - flagrantly showing off the heterosexual eye candy in his life.
When I was at Les last weekend - I walked to the bar to get a beer. Noticed the cellist was cranking his head in my direction - he had a strange political mask on so I've no idea what he looked like but he could play the hell out of the cello. Crick in the neck? I like to think so. Maybe not.
I made a cute histotech blush the other day. He went red from neck to forehead. It was endearing.
I feel like I've got this strange power - one that was maybe always there but I've never been aware of. Makes me feel strong, self-confident, and (yes) alluring.
But let me make things abundantly clear. I'm not looking. Leos are nothing, if not loyal. Fiercely loyal. Even when they humiliate themselves on the internet - yes, embarrassingly loyal.
Still, it's fun to feel pretty. It's been a long time.
Kyla, I am so sorry I accidentally deleted your comment! Thanks - yes, it's nice, even when you are in the middle of a divorce and looking for a new relationship is the last thing on your mind.
You need to work it.
Get to know and cultivate your Girl-Power/Inner Diva/Female Mystique/Femme Fatal,whathaveyou! She is different from who she was when you were married (and especially from when you were last single!) and she needs to be unleashed, studied and exercised (all by YOU, of course) before you begin dating again.
Use those interested nibbles to practice your skills... Smiling, flirting, hair flipping, perfecting your (bamchickibambam) walk that stops men in their tracks - even if you're wearing scrubs. *nods*
We ALL can do it, but few figure out how to really tap in and use it... even fewer, to their own benefit.
Girl-power is AWESOME.
Great advice, DC.
Yeah, it's been over 14 years since I was single, and I sure didn't know what the hell I was doing back then.
This is going to be fun.
I've been trying to decide how to use this superpower for the benefit of others. Detecting asshole males, sucking them in, then humiliating them? No, really, I'm way too lazy for that level of design. Probably I'll just sit at the bar with my girlfriends and chat about books as usual.
I'll just use it for my own benefit, as you suggest. Time for me to benefit - it's been a long time since I've let that happen.
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